Why are so many of us so sure we love Jesus Christ? Ask almost any good Christian and we will tell you how Christ’s forgiveness has changed our lives. We often declare our love for Him in the strongest terms. But how can we be so sure? Could we be confusing appreciation and gratitude for love?
A few years ago I had a very vivid dream. I was in a church meeting and there was a new teacher. He stood up and began the lesson. He began to say things which were so outrageous that members in the class began to yell at him and throw things at him. He just put up with it until he couldn’t communicate anymore and then he collected his things to leave. He had only been teaching for about 10-15 minutes. I was sitting next to the isle leading to the exit. I too was quite upset at the ideas he presented. As he passed me on his way out, he stopped and put his hand on my shoulder. A small smile touched his face: “You too are forgiven.” My mouth dropped open at his words and I wanted to exclaim, “Who do you think you are!?” But at that moment I knew that He was Jesus of Nazareth. I was stunned! This was Christ?! But along with everyone else, I had just rejected Him! He left and the dream ended.
I awoke from that dream all twisted up inside. For years I had prayed that God would let me know His Son in a personal way. I had had some help from Him in the past and now I wanted to know Him. Here in a dream I had had the chance and I had rejected Him! Good Grief!
A few days later after a well taught Sunday school lesson on Jesus, I went up to talk to the teacher. As he was cleaning the chalkboard with his back to me, I approached him and asked, “If Jesus was alive today and you met Him, do you think you would like Him?” He stopped and turned to stare at me. He was clearly not pleased, “I would love him!!” He declared emphatically.
His stare said, “How dare you ask such a ridiculous thing!” Deep inside I heard, “ I would crucify Him!” “Oh” I nodded and turned away grieved. I knew, despite the delightful lesson, that he we no friend of Jesus. I wasn’t sure I was either.
I wonder if I should have pointed out that the religious Jews of Christ’s day all looked forward with great longing and anticipation to the Messiah’s coming. They too, if asked would have certainly declared their devotion to him. But when he came, they killed him. The scriptures give other examples of God’s messengers (and their message) being rejected.
Who is most likely to reject one sent by God? Checking the record we find two different classes: the religious and pious, and the elite ruling class.
It is not just their pride, it’s also because neither the message nor the messenger fits their preconceived notions. They always expect God to confirm their beliefs and lifestyle. He won’t, so they have to reject His messenger.
I began wondering if He would be any more accepted now than He was in the past. I began to evaluate my relationship with Him. If a man came and began to introduce thoughts and ideas which did not agree or belittled in anyway the doctrines and traditions I was raised on, (like Jesus did to the Jews) I might have as much trouble accepting and liking Him as did many in 30AD. I’m afraid that like the Jews long ago, the roots of my faith have gone too deep to just toss them out based on the words of some passing carpenter.
Sadly knowing this only partially prepares me. I honestly don’t know if I would like Christ. I do know that His sacrifice and His grace have blessed me. I feel profoundly grateful to Him and in a very personal way I appreciate Him. Liking Him is another matter. I have a long way yet to go.