It was Sunday and I was in church listening to the Stake president speak. (He’s the leader over a large population of LDS).  He was vehemently denouncing Satan and calling him a fool.  I attending an older singles ward and many were feeling depressed that they weren’t married.  LDS believe you must be married to achieve the highest level in heaven not to mention the highest positions in the church. Not having met this minimum requirement; many there were suffering a little depression.  The president wanted to help these singles feel better about themselves by showing them that they were a lot better off than another population in God’s family; namely Satan and his followers. 

But his words began to bother me deeply and I wanted to leave.  The more he put down Satan and ridiculed the evil spirits who had followed him the worse I felt.  I had no idea why this was bothering me so much but I knew I had to find out.

I was living in my grandparent’s basement at the time, so when I got home I went downstairs to my bedroom, closed the door and began to pray.  I really struggled for awhile.  Why was this put down of Satan so troubling? After 20-25 minutes of real intense prayer my mind grew tired and I lay back on my bed to relax for a bit.  Then I remembered (or did I imagine this?) Lucifer. What a huge bright spirit he was! He was so delightful to be with.  He was clever and funny and attracted many with his great intellect.

We all lived happily in God’s love. Then God’s will for us was revealed and most of us rejoiced immediately.  But Lucifer hesitated. As more of us went to him, wanting him to join in the rejoicing, he grew more reticent.  He proposed a plan full of force and control.  What a surprise! Who would have ever thought of going against our Father! Who would want to be controlled by others? But there were many who did like it.  They joined with Lucifer in pushing for his plan.  We were divided! Lucifer was opposing our Father! He threatened to leave if he didn’t get his way. Never before had this happened! We pleaded with him to change his mind and stay.  He refused.  The will of God could not be changed. Most of us wouldn’t want it changed.

The division and strife increased. War ensued but not as we know it here.  I remember being part of a group who reached out with love and being met with fear. It was welcome against rejection, peace against frustration, and sorrow against anger. Humility called out to pride, wisdom appealed to foolishness, (and had more success than all other efforts) and confidence tried to overwhelm despair. We didn’t throw Lucifer out of heaven. He couldn’t stand the intensity of our love and welcome, so he twisted his reality to where he was unaware of God and the rest of us. We could easily see him but he and his followers shut themselve away from any awareness of us.

I began to cry there in my bedroom. I had really loved Lucifer.  I missed him. There was no one like him before or since. What I would give to see him again accepting truth and righteousness. I know that there are many who feel the same. How we would rejoice if he would repent and come back.  But his course is well set and his pride so destructive. 

So that is why the Stake President’s words bothered me.  It wasn’t that he was wrong in anything he said. Satan was foolish: pride can make a fool of even the most intelligent. It was his attitude. He was rejecting and insulting. It wasn’t just that he spoke of someone I still love. Negativity attracts evil. He was calling out to the very person he was rejecting.  Fear and hatred attract evil. You don’t overcome evil with pride and rejection. You do it with humility and welcome.  Christ said to love our enemies not just because he wanted us to be nice; but because only by keeping our hearts filled with love will we overcome evil.  Evil is kept as far from us as we are loving and welcoming.